A Mother鈥檚 Resilience
In this episode of Unstoppable Stories, host Lauren Cardillo sits down with Lynnette Lamp, a proud 兔子先生alumna, who shares her remarkable path鈥攆rom young mom to Maryland鈥檚 Mom of the Year, widow to therapist, and student to graduate.
Lynnette鈥檚 story is a powerful testament to the resilience of mothers and an inspiration to anyone navigating the loss of their loved one and coping through grief. Don鈥檛 miss this heartfelt conversation filled with strength, hope, and transformation.
Episode Information
Lynnette Lamp:
I became a widow also when I was 23, so I had my third son by that point, and they were 5 and 3 and 4 months old, and that was definitely the last real big struggle, real hard life experience that I personally experienced, where I benefited. from therapy and I benefited from counseling that I realized that like I needed to start giving back and I, that was something that I wanted to then be able to do for other people.
Intro:
Welcome to the 兔子先生podcast Unstoppable Stories with your host, Lauren Cardillo.
Lauren Cardillo:
Today I'm joined by Lynnette Lamp, a recent 兔子先生grad. Welcome, Lynnette. Thanks so much for being here. Hi, it's nice to be here. Thanks for having me. So, last time you and I saw each other, you were going through a crazy graduation ceremony, but the thing that stood out to me was, someone said to me, do you know that Lynnette is a Maryland Mother of the Year?
And I was like, what is that? So tell me about that because it's just a fun, you know, fact, right? About you.
Lynnette Lamp:
Yeah. It is a fun fact. And prior to like actually serving in that role, it just seemed like something that was made up, you know, like people would say like, Oh, my mom is the mom of the year. Um, so it is a real thing.
It's put on by the American Mothers Incorporated. So it's AMI. Um, it was founded by Eleanor Roosevelt, and her philosophy was really to highlight women that were doing impactful things in their community, um, and whatever that may be. So lots of different domains were covered in that. So I was nominated in.
Um, and I went to Omaha with all of the other mothers of the year from the different states. And we, like, got together for a convention and
Lauren Cardillo:
spent time together. It was, it was really cool. How did that make you feel that something you were doing, like volunteer work, you know, which often gets overlooked, how did that make you feel that someone said, we want to, you know, signal you out?
Lynnette Lamp:
Um, it was really special to me personally because I became a mom when I was 18. So I was a very young mom and like always was kind of living life against the stereotype for young moms at that time. Um, so I felt like it was like, maybe even just a little bit more special and cool that I was going out there.
I don't even think I was 30 yet, um, when I went. So like. Where I just turned 30 and I had three children and the fact that I had done so much like within that time of raising these children was, it was really, really special. Yeah. What did your boys think? They thought it was really cool. Um, they would go around and like tell the people on their soccer team or like tell people at school.
Um, but again, like it didn't seem like a real thing. So they often like got the question back like. What are you talking about? You know, so then they would say like, no, she's like flying to Omaha and who flies to Omaha? Well, I did. Cause it was like the center of the nation. So that was their whole idea.
Like let's all meet in the middle. But yeah, they, they don't use it as much anymore as they used to though, I'll say that.
Lauren Cardillo:
I love it. But I could see it on a soccer field, someone going, well, my mom's the mom of the year too. Yeah. It's right. But go back a little bit. So you were, you were a mom at 18, but you finished high school, had a 4.0, am I mistaken? Yeah. About that. Yeah. I mean. Tell me about that journey, you know, because like you said, it was against stereotype.
Lynnette Lamp:
It really was. Um, so I found out that I was pregnant, um, in March of my senior year and I just was open and honest with my teachers and I was like, Hey guys, so this is what's going on.
Um, I'm still dedicated to doing my work and showing up when I can. Um, So I got a lot of teacher support to help me graduate. I graduated with like a 4. 02 or something like that. Um, so I was taking an honors class even then. And I still, you know, went to college after I had graduated high school. Um, but when I had my second son at 20, that's when it was like, oof, um, I'm going to have to definitely put education on the back burner for a little bit, survive this time of life.
Maybe, somewhere down the road, I'll go back.
Lauren Cardillo:
You weren't in Maryland at that time, were you? You grew up somewhere else. Am I, am I remembering that right? So
Lynnette Lamp:
I was here in Maryland at that time, um, but I grew up with a father that was in the military. So I wasn't born here. I came to Maryland when I was seven, I think. But I've been here for a long time.
Lauren Cardillo:
Cool. And one of the things you said, I think it might have been in our previous interview, was the idea that you sort of had to delay your dream of going to college because you had kids. You know, I mean, how did, how did you make that dream come true eventually?
Lynnette Lamp:
So I did have to put it on the back burner, um, which was okay. It wasn't like that was, you Something I necessarily like had resentment towards it was just what had to happen so I would work in the evening. Um, so that someone, a parent was always with my children. Um, but then, you know, life changes every day all the time. Um, and I had a few different life experiences that told me that.
Lauren Cardillo:
I wanted the career of being a therapist. So once I really was able to like, clarify the career that I wanted and narrow it down to that point, I was like, uh, education. All right. So let's go back. Let's see. What education do I have to do to get to this point? And that's where I'm at now. When you say life experiences, I know what you're, you're talking about, but tell.
People who are listening or watching. I mean, it wasn't an easy path for you. No,
Lynnette Lamp:
it was not an easy path, path whatsoever. Um, I became a widow also when I was 23, so I had my third son by that point. Um, and they were five and three and four months old. And that was definitely the last, like, real big struggle, real hard life experience that I personally experienced where I benefited.
from therapy, and I benefited from counseling, um, that I realized that, like, I needed to start, like, giving back, and I, that was something that I wanted to then be able to do for other people, um, cause it saved my life, so it was valuable to me, and it was something that I really felt like more people were going to need, and I wanted to be a part of that giving.
You, you could
Lauren Cardillo:
have, like, done, gone the other path, I don't mean in a bad sense, but not giving back and just said, life, You know, it's hard, I'm just going to keep to myself and try to keep going and you sort of found a different path, you know, that people might find really inspiring because it's hard to do.
It is. It
Lynnette Lamp:
is hard to do. And I would counter that and say that I kind of took both. Um, my husband passed away in 2016 and life did shut down for me and in quite a few ways. Um, and I did like kind of get into my hermit. But again, that's. where counseling came in and different support and different recovery.
Um, so I was able to start school in 2019 and now have been in school since 2019 and that's, like, so long.
Lauren Cardillo:
I know, and your kids must be like, Mom!
Lynnette Lamp:
Yeah!
Lauren Cardillo:
You've been in school for a long time. Yeah,
Lynnette Lamp:
that works out because they're older now. They're 14. Um, my middle son is going to be 12 and my youngest is 9.
And there are days they don't want to go to school and I'm like, yeah, man, I don't want to go to school either. Guess what? I'm going. You're going too. So that helps. That's great.
Lauren Cardillo:
Part of them must like hate that idea. Like a mom, you know, why can't you be like the other moms? Yeah, probably. I remember you also telling me, um, Like, you were doing school everywhere, like, on a laptop, watching soccer games.
I think people can really relate to that, the idea of fitting things in, so tell us more about that.
Lynnette Lamp:
Absolutely. And that's Part of why I asked to meet like a little bit later today because I was fitting in doctor's appointments and getting ready for finals that are coming up. Um, so yes, it is not uncommon to find me sitting in my car at some soccer practice or some event with my laptop, with a book, with a notebook.
Doing school. Um, it's still something I do to this day. I love that my phone connects to my laptop and I use my hotspot. If we are going to a tournament and somebody else is driving, I have been doing school while we are doing our hour commute to the game. I fit it in any, really anywhere that I can, besides the weekend.
That is something that I just really started becoming firmer about in boundaries in graduate school, um, because everyone needs a break. Um. But I have had books with me this weekend when we were at a tournament. I was reading the textbook that I have to read for my class tomorrow. Um, any time I can fit it in in the middle, I will be doing school.
Lauren Cardillo:
What do you think, um, drives that determination, you know, because you could just put the book away and not do it. What is driving you?
Lynnette Lamp:
Um, really? It all goes back to The idea of serving others. Um, I would love to not read sometimes, but then I also wouldn't be able to pass my classes. And make this dream like really a reality that it somewhat is already becoming because I do get to sit and work with clients now.
Um, so that really is what pushes me. This is. What I feel like I've been put here to do. And this is just the unfortunate stuff that I have to do to get there and make that dream
Lauren Cardillo:
true. Do you think that idea of service comes from your military background? Just curious. Um,
Lynnette Lamp:
yes and no. So I definitely think that growing up in a military household, you do get more of that collectivistic, like, we're all in this together more than just like the individual tribe.
Um, but I really value the idea of healing through serving, um, and that is. Probably the bigger motivator that when you go out and you do service, it, it cuts your problems in half or it makes your suffering less unique because you see where it is everywhere in the world. Um, so that's really what drives it.
Lauren Cardillo:
Do you have an experience you can tell us about where that really happened, where you went, you know, cause I know that was one of the things that you were nominated as mother of the year was your service in the community. Do you have an experience you can tell us about that? Really showed that
Lynnette Lamp:
every summer going back to like my own experience with grief and bereavement We my family would go to camp nude on it's put on by compass hospice, and it is a weekend grief retreat Which sounds really weird unless you're in that world I?
Had gone and I had gained so much for myself and my Children as a participant. Um, this summer was the third year. I think I've gone back as the volunteer on the family side. Every year I meet someone who has had some sort of loss that I couldn't imagine. And I know that my loss was so unimaginable to myself, besides the fact that I live it.
When you, when I go out and I see these other people and I see what has happened to them, it just, It gives compassion to myself, it gives compassion to them. We're not alone, you know, people struggle with things every single day, but we often keep it to ourselves and then feel even more alone in it. So I really just appreciate being put in these places to be around people that are brave enough to be vulnerable and share what is causing their, their hang up in their life.
Lauren Cardillo:
That is amazing. It, it sounds like a win win, even though most people wouldn't think that way, you know, that it, it works for both of you.
Lynnette Lamp:
Yes. I learned so much, um, even from the clients that I see today, yes, like it is. I am, I am giving or I'm just giving presence or time or listening. Um, but what I get to witness from them is just like, it's soul filling.
Honestly, that's what it is.
Lauren Cardillo:
So talk to me about the journey you're on now, because We can, we'll back up into 兔子先生and other things, but right now you're doing a master's and sort of what's your end game and what are you doing? What's your experience? So
Lynnette Lamp:
my degree with 兔子先生set me up to go to the University of Baltimore.
Um, I'm currently in my second year of their master's program. It is a three year program. So I will graduate in spring 2026. But they re like, I'll be able to sit and take my NCE exam. I'll graduate with my licensed graduate professional counsel counselor license. So they help a lot with that, with that whole process.
And. I just started, um, my practicum experience in the fall, so I started seeing clients. Um, I have, I think, around 10 clients that I see right now. We're coming to the end of the semester, thank goodness, I'm tired. Um, but I will continue, like, seeing clients over break, so that's really cool, and I'm, I'm grateful that I get to have that experience too.
Lauren Cardillo:
So is it a master's in social work or it's a master's in counseling? Oh, I'm sorry. So it is
Lynnette Lamp:
a master's in applied psychology with a practitioner specialization. So that means it's just more focused on being a therapist and being a counselor. Like I have to take three semesters of practicum and internship.
A good thing though, right?
Lauren Cardillo:
So back up a little for me. You originally started, did you start at Anne Arundel Community? Where did you start your sort of education?
Lynnette Lamp:
I had gone back to Anne Arundel, um, because it was close. I knew where it was. And I started right before COVID. So COVID changed everything. Um, I graduated, I got my associates there and then transferred to UMGC.
And then 兔子先生is where I finished my bachelor's in science and psychology. And I did take a lot of social science classes, which is an integrated discipline. So it has social work, psychology, anthropology, political science, like that was cool. That was, I really appreciated those classes.
Lauren Cardillo:
And it was an easy process to go from one to the other, you know, in the sense of, like, transfer credits.
You didn't waste time. No, I had
Lynnette Lamp:
already started talking with UMGC, um, prior to finishing at Anne Arundel, and they had some sort of connection between the schools. Everything transferred over very easily, um. I got many different phone calls from the advisors at UMGC. That was really great. They would help me, like, register for classes and there was, it was not hard whatsoever to switch over.
Lauren Cardillo:
Were there groups within UMGC? When I read through, like, your interview and your notes, you talked about in the sense of, you know, writing centers and all these different things that, like, helped you succeed, you know? And Yeah. Were you surprised
Lynnette Lamp:
by that? How helpful were they? Oh man, I used the writing center, I think, for every single paper that I did when I was at UMGC.
Because why not? You know, it was there, it was easy to use, you would go to the library website, you would upload your paper, they'd email you back, you would change things, send it back to them. Um, I Definitely utilized more services at 兔子先生than I had done prior. I don't know if it was because it was an online campus it was just, it was easy to know what I could receive how to get it.
So the ease of it and the accessibility, I, I used a lot of the services that were there, definitely the writing center. I wrote a paper one time and I sent it in there and the feedback I got, I was like, Oh man,
but you'd rather get the feedback from the writing tutor than your professor. Um, so I use, I use that all the time and that is something that I've carried on, uh, Um, and has been a really great tool that I had this experience of having to navigate online. Um, it has transferred over to my graduate schooling as well.
Lauren Cardillo:
Obviously your, your education has inspired your kids? What do you think they've gotten out of watching you?
Lynnette Lamp:
Um, I think that they've probably like the biggest message that they've gotten is that it takes a lot of hard work. Takes a lot of hard work and to be clear on what you want to do, uh, before you commit to all of that hard work.
Um, that has been like a really To me, a big blessing in my motivation for school. I know what I want my career to be. So now I know what I need my education to be. And it takes a lot of hard work. You shuffle things around. Um, and also taking care of myself. Like I said, like I've really Put a boundary on the weekend.
Um, because I think it's important for them to see that too. That besides working or doing something, like sitting and taking care of yourself, is doing something as well.
Lauren Cardillo:
Do you think they have some educational, like, aspirations now, or it's too early, or they've sort of formed stuff in their heads?
Lynnette Lamp:
I'm not sure.
Um, we always talk about, um, The diversity of of education. Um, you know, it's not just a college degree. There are technical schools. You could go and do different things. Um, I would hope that it'll be more so they think about what they want to do. And then they'll think about. Educational things. My oldest will talk about, like, when he's at college and living in a dorm with his best friend, but that's not, like, that's the experience.
That's not the education.
Lauren Cardillo:
And I mean, I have two daughters, one of whom is out of college and one who's homeless, and they all say that, like, when they're, like, 10. I'm going to college with my best friend. We're living in the dorms and it's like, okay, so what are you thinking like five years from now? Where are you going to be?
Lynnette Lamp:
Five years from now, I will have my LGPC. I might even have my LCPC. There are 3000 hours that take like that. Make that jump from the G. To the sea. So I'm not sure if that's five years, but I will definitely at least have one of my licenses. Um, I'm really enjoying the place that I'm at the site that I've been put at.
It's called for all seasons. Um, it's a nonprofit, they do a lot of community work where I live. I'd hope to still be there. Um, at that point, I don't really have any big grandiose plans on private practice or anything like that, um, cause I'm not a business person. So first I got to figure out the mental health world and what it's like being a therapist before I would think about like understanding all of the business aspects that go into private practice.
So I would hope to just kind of be in the same place that I'm at, just not doing school anymore.
Lauren Cardillo:
Go back for a second and tell me what those two degrees, you just, or the, or those licenses, what they actually mean, because you use the, uh, abbreviation for them. What are they?
Lynnette Lamp:
So an LGPC is a licensed graduate professional counselor.
Um, to receive that, you still take the NCE. You have to take a Maryland state law exam. Um, and you have to have, I think, a thousand hours of practicum and internship. Um, and then you apply for that license. And with that license, you are able to provide care. Um, you still have to be All of your things still are signed off by a supervisor, um, like they are now, right, right now, as I'm an intern.
And then the LCPC is the licensed clinical professional counselor. So then you have to have 3, 000 hours for that of experience, direct clinical experience. I think you sit and take the NCE again and the Maryland State Logs Am again. Um, But at that point, there's no progression. Like that is the last one.
We're done. No doctorate dreams right now. I need a break from school. I'm just being real.
Lauren Cardillo:
Is, is there a community that you really enjoy serving that you've discovered so far?
Lynnette Lamp:
The community I know the best. Uh, the Greece community. Um, people who have experienced trauma. Um, Depression and anxiety like those have those seem to just click.
Well, I'm really open to everything still at this point because I firmly believe that I won't really know if it's not the right thing for me until I do it. Um, That comes with a grain of salt because there are some things that I know, like now, um, like I don't, I'm not necessarily at the point where I'll work with children under five.
Like that, that's really hard and you need a lot of practice and experience in that specialty training. Um, that's not something I think I'll be doing right now, but who knows in my future. Um, it's just really cool when someone comes in and. Um, gets to a point where they feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable and have uncomfortable conversations that society doesn't always tell us how to have.
Not everybody has them in the same way. Um, just being a witness to that has been really amazing.
Lauren Cardillo:
Great. If you, if someone's watching or listening to this, who's thinking about going back to school because They want to pursue their dream like you have done. What would be your advice?
Lynnette Lamp:
Nike. Just do it. Just do it.
Just hop on into it. I have found that I have to take some small step, uh, to really get the ball rolling. So that might be just calling the advisor or sending an email and get more information about what you'll have to do before you just think that you can't do it, uh, cause you might be able to do it.
Lauren Cardillo:
Did, did you have that moment with your first class where you were like, you signed up and we're talking online, where you signed up and you were like, Oh my God, what have I done?
Lynnette Lamp:
Absolutely. Um, even after every semester break, there would be, you get back into reading at that level, writing at that level, analyzing information. It's like, Oh man, it's hard. You got to give yourself time. It takes time.
Lauren Cardillo:
Yeah. I mean, it's, it's fear and then you have to sort of chip away at it, you know, slowly.
What is your, your mom's, your mom, what does she think of all this?
Lynnette Lamp:
It's actually really funny because, um, so I'm 32 and we saw each other a week ago and she was asking me about, um, you know, like how things were going on my site. How was I taking care of myself? I was responding to her and she looked at me and she said, wow.
Like, this is the first time I'm really looking at you and seeing you as an adult. Like, you're my baby. But you're doing all these adult things. You've had all of this adult stuff happen to you. And I was like, yeah, it's pretty weird, isn't it? So she's,
Lauren Cardillo:
she thinks it's pretty cool. Probably takes a little, um, what's the word I'm looking for?
Little onus off for her too, right? You know, I don't have to worry about you.
Lynnette Lamp:
Yeah, and she likes to be able to say like, well, this is my daughter and like, this is what she's had done. She went around and told a lot of people that I was the, the mother of the year, that year. Yeah.
Lauren Cardillo:
She could do your, your public relations for you, right? Probably. Yeah. So if like you, who was that little kid who was a military kid for a while, saw you today. What, what would you, what would, what would that little girl think?
Lynnette Lamp:
I think it's really funny that you asked me this too, because this just came up last week.
Um, she'd be really proud. She would be like, wow, like you've really grown into this person of who you were supposed to be. And like, that's pretty cool. And it's okay if it takes a little bit longer, like who, who even knows what time, like when we're supposed to arrive at things and just, she'd be proud of me that I kept going.
There were a lot of times I didn't want to,
Lauren Cardillo:
she'd be proud of me. How did it come up last week? What came up in conversation that, that idea?
Lynnette Lamp:
Um, well one of my classes is a group counseling class and we do like the first half of the class is lecture and information and then the second half is actually like a group session where we all sit and we're members and one peer will Lead each week and the theory last week was about family systems and family functioning and like experiences from childhood that have impacted you and stayed with you.
And we ended it with, uh, that question of how do you think the 10 year old version of yourself would, would look at yourself today and what would, what would they say? Yeah. I get like exposed to a lot of cool. things because of my education.
Lauren Cardillo:
I could be a therapist now.
Lynnette Lamp:
I asked the question, right?
Lauren Cardillo:
No! There are a lot of people who think therapy, mental health, you know, I can talk to my friends.
As somebody who's going into this field, what would you say?
Lynnette Lamp:
Um, I think talking to your friends is a great added bonus and a great additional support. Um, there are some things that happen in life that we as humans don't know how to handle. We don't know how to fix. Um, we're not even clear on like how we are reacting to the situation that's to us.
So then to like put the responsibility onto your friend, like, Hey, I don't really know what's going on with me, but help me get through it. Um, some things shouldn't be put on your friends and should be put on people that have been taught how to listen, how to hold space, um, how to ask the right questions.
How to not say something when nothing needs to be said, and that's, that's really hard to do, even as someone who's learning how to do that, that can be a challenge. Or not ushering someone to get better and just meeting them where they're at, helping them know that part of them that's there, and then being there when they decide to move on.
It's a really hard thing to do sometimes. Your friend always can't do that.
Lauren Cardillo:
Lynnette, thanks so much for joining us today and telling us your inspiring stories and how you want to go forward and help people. I think it's great. And thank you also for our listeners and our viewers. If you'd like to hear more Unstoppable Stories, please like and subscribe.
Thank you and see you next time.
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